Walking Away

Jesus said something very odd and very disturbing. It was so odd and disturbing that people walked away.

“Those who eat my flesh and drink my blood abide in me and I in them. Just as the living Father sent me and I live because of the Father, so whoever eats me will live because of me. This is the bread that came down from heaven, not like that which the ancestors ate, and they died. But the one who eats this bread will live forever.” He said these things while he was teaching in a synagogue at Capernaum. (John 6:56-59 NRSV)

Now, at the very end of the story, as told in John chapter 6, we discover that all this dialogue between Jesus and the crowd took place in a synagogue. I suspect this location and occasion made Jesus’ teaching even more troubling.

“When many of his disciples heard it, they said, “This teaching is difficult; who can accept it?” But Jesus, being aware that his disciples were complaining about it, said to them, “Does this offend you? Then what if you were to see the Son of Man ascending to where he was before? It is the Spirit that gives life; the flesh is useless. The words that I have spoken to you are spirit and life. But among you there are some who do not believe.” For Jesus knew from the beginning who were the ones who did not believe and who was the one who would betray him. And he said, “For this reason I have told you that no one can come to me unless it is granted by the Father.” Because of this many of his disciples turned back and no longer went about with him. So Jesus asked the twelve, “Do you also wish to go away?” Simon Peter answered him, “Lord, to whom can we go? You have the words of eternal life. We have come to believe and know that you are the Holy One of God.” (John 6:60-69 NRSV)¹

Even Peter, who stayed, seemed perplexed as if he didn’t understand but didn’t know what else to do. “to whom can we go?

We may wonder how people could walk away from Jesus. They were in the presence of the Messiah himself, how could they leave? It’s helpful for us to remember that we read and interpret Jesus’ words knowing about the resurrection and ascension. We benefit from two thousand years of theological reflection. Even with all that, what Jesus has been saying in John chapter 6 is difficult for us to grasp. Jesus contemporaries didn’t have our perspective. They had no experience of the risen Christ. They are expecting the Messiah to be a hero who will restore the nation of Israel, right now, in real time, in the real world. Instead they are talking face to face with someone they know. Jesus may be an interesting and gifted teacher, but he’s also just a guy from their hometown. They know Jesus, they know his family. (John 6:42) No wonder they thought this was “difficult”.

What I find interesting and instructive is how Jesus treated the ones who left.

He just lets them go. He doesn’t beg them to stay. He’s not angry. He doesn’t threaten them with eternal conscious torment for not believing. He acknowledged them and that they don’t believe, that they don’t entrust themselves to him. Then he lets them go. The capacity to entrust themselves to Jesus has not been granted, not given by the Father.

I don’t think this necessarily means that the ability to entrust themselves to Jesus will never be granted. Jesus lets those who do not believe walk away. The text says “many of his disciples turned back and no longer went about with him.” Maybe they no longer believed Jesus was the Messiah- at least not the Messiah they were looking for. Maybe Jesus gave them space and time to think about what has just happened and what Jesus has said. Can you imagine them walking away and not discussing what Jesus has said? The feeding of the five thousand and Jesus’ discourse must have been a topic of intense discussion. Did people gain insight as they talked? Most of us have had the experience of not understanding something until we talked it out with someone else. Did some of those who “turned back” turn toward Jesus again? The way Jesus let them go, without rancor, without shame, without threats, kept open the possibility that they could return.

Jesus extends a welcome to all to listen and ask questions and walk with him. He doesn’t demand belief. He rarely asks- and then it’s just the twelve. “Who do you say that I am?”

Jesus gives people time and space to grapple with his unexpected way of being the Messiah, and his unexpected bringing of the kingdom of God. And he lets the confused and the mistaken stay with him- until the “end” and past the “end”. Peter, who leaves Jesus at the crucifixion, is given the opportunity to return to Jesus. He’s not summoned to Jesus, Jesus finds him. Jesus finds all the disciples who “go away” and bids them peace.

Jesus doesn’t demand correct belief as much as he invites continued relationship. Jesus doesn’t compromise of change his teaching. But he also invites conversation and questions. He is patient with them and with us.

Beloved, if you are having trouble believing, entrusting Jesus. That’s okay. Be honest with yourself and Jesus. And continue to ask questions. Continue to speak truthfully, “This teaching is difficult.” Wisdom and understanding come in the Father’s time. “No one can come to me unless it is granted/given by the Father.” I don’t think this is a threat. Belief is only given to some and is withheld from others. I think this is an acknowledgement that belief comes to us as we are able to accept it and understand it. For some it is more slow, for some it comes more quickly. But Jesus doesn’t give up on us.

1. The lectionary leaves off the last two verses of the chapter. “Jesus answered them, “Did I knot choose you, the twelve? Yet one of you is a devil.” He was speaking of Judas son of Simon Iscariot, for he, though one of the twelve, was going to betray him. John 6:70-71 NRSV ↩︎